Jumbled Emotions

As an Enneagram 6, a planner, a mom, I plan for the worst and hope for the best.

Truthfully, I’m not so great on that second part.

I'm just going to jump in the hypothetical worst case scenario simulator

I prefer to have a plan, but I know that everything can does go to sh*t. Generally, I plan for every possibility and achieve my personal state of calm.

And then comes along 2020.

Remember this?

That was FIVE months ago.

There is just so much going on and going wrong.

Yes, some things are going to be better, but it’s SO hard to see the light at the end of the tunnel.

As we approach the “end” of “summer,” we are facing the jumbled emotions and no-win situations that revolve around back to school.

School Covid Venn Diagram

Am I doing what’s right for My Child? Am I being selfish and only thinking of myself? Am I making more work for her teachers? Am I putting her teachers at a higher risk?

I’m angry that I have to make a decision. I’m angry that I don’t know what is the best decision. I resent that I have to make a decision at all. I resent that I can’t make the decision I really want to make.

AM I DOING ANYTHING RIGHT?!?!?

Time to refocus.

I am doing the best I can.

Always do your best. Everybody's best is different. You can't always be the best, but you can always do your best.

YOU are doing the best you can.

We will get through this.

If today was heavy, put it down and start again tomorrow

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