Right now we are in the midst of Ramadan, Passover has begun, Easter weekend is upon us. Mother’s Day is coming in less than a month for the roughly half the world. Father’s day is just behind it.

These seasons, holidays, expectations, and interactions can all be really difficult if you don’t have a good relationship with your church, your organized religion, your mom, your dad, etc.

The following is reposted from 5 years ago.

The holidays are coming.

Some people are SO on board. Some people are not.

It may be easier to just brush the second type of people aside and think, “Oh, they just don’t have the holiday spirit.” or “What’s wrong with them? It’s Christmas/Thanksgiving/Hanukkah!” 

But, what if those holidays are SO HARD for a person?

What if looking at every fabulously decorated tree reminds you of a hurt childhood? What if every time you hear that song, a memory of a horrible accident comes crashing into your mind uninvited? What if plans and invitations for holiday parties and gathering just highlight someone who is gone?

Appropriately posted earlier this week, one of the things I want to focus on this year is reaching out during the holidays. 

Do you have a friend who is not quite herself lately? A neighbor you haven’t seen as often recently? Your child’s friend is not as outgoing as they used to be? What can you do?

I read these two articles recently and wanted to share:

I found those very helpful if it’s someone other than yourself who needs help. 

But, what if it’s YOU who needs help this season?

Please know – you are NOT alone. 

Also important:

I know I need this reminder. I also know I have literally yelled that last line at a friend and a family member on separate occasions.

You do not have to be okay during a time that is hard. You do NOT have to keep it all together. It is OK to fall apart.

One thing I am adamant about is that you need to do what is best for yourself at this time. Maybe you need to skip that one party this year. Maybe you need to plan to leave family dinner an hour or so early if you know it will be too much for you. Think about what will help you feel safe during this time.

I don’t know you personally.

I don’t know your story. 

I AM a great listener.

For real.

I know sometimes it is easier to talk about a difficult thing with someone you don’t know. 

Maybe you have people who you trust and who you can open up to. Maybe you don’t. 

I would like to advise you to find someone if you feel like you need to talk. 

I wholeheartedly volunteer if I can be of assistance. 

So, please think about what you’ve read.
Reach out if you need to talk OR if you think someone else needs to talk.
They might think you are butting in,
but they also may be relieved YOU started the conversation.

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